February 2011
Feb 1st
51 notes
Feb 1st
7,738 notes
January 2011
Catching Them All
mybiggestregretever: My biggest regret ever is catching them all.  I really regret catching all the Pokemon. I have no room in my house anymore with all these Pokeballs everywhere, and they’re all so needy, especially Snorlax — all it does is eat.  It’s really ruining my life. [Male, 18]
Jan 27th
3,763 notes
Just got comfortable, now I have to pee. INCONVENIENCE MUCH?
Jan 25th
An Atheist Professor of Philosophy was speaking to...
Professor: You are a Christian, aren’t you, son?
Student: Yes, sir.
Professor: So, you believe in God?
Student: Absolutely, sir.
Professor: Is God good?
Student: Sure.
Professor: My brother died of cancer, even though he prayed to God to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But God didn’t. How is God good, then? Hmm?
(Student was silent)
Professor: You can’t answer, can you? Let’s start again, young fella. Is God good?
Student: Yes.
Professor: Is Satan good?
Student: No.
Professor: Where does Satan come from?
Student: From.. God.
Professor: That’s right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?
Student: Yes.
Professor: Evil is everywhere, isn’t it? And God did make everything. Correct?
Student: Yes.
Professor: So who created evil?
(Student didn’t answer)
Professor: Is there sickness? Immortality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don’t they?
Student: Yes, sir.
Professor: So, who created them?
(Student had no answer)
Professor: Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Tell me, son.. have you ever seen God?
Student: No, sir.
Professor: Tell us if you have ever heard your God.
Student: No, sir.
Professor: Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God, smelt your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God, for that matter?
Student: No, sir. I’m afraid I haven’t.
Professor: Yet you still believe in Him?
Student: Yes.
Professor: According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, Science says your God doesn’t exist. What do you say to that, son?
Student: Nothing. I only have my Faith.
Professor: Yes, Faith. And that is the problem Science has.
Student: Professor, is there such a thing as Heat?
Professor: Yes.
Student: And is there such a thing as Cold?
Professor: Yes.
Student: No, sir, there isn’t.
(The Lecture Theatre became very quiet with this turn of events)
Student: Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat. But we don’t have anything called cold. We can hit 458 Degrees below Zero which is no heat, but we can’t go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of Heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.
(There was a pon-drop silence in the Lecture Theatre)
Student: What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?
Professor: Yes. What is night if there isn’t darkness?
Student: You’re wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have Low Light, Normal Light, Bright Light, Flashing Light… But if you have No Light constantly, you have nothing and it’s called Darkness, isn’t it? In reality, darkness isn’t. If it is, You would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn’t you?
Professor: So what is the point you are making, young man?
Student: Sir, my point is, your Philosophical Premise is flawed.
Professor: Flawed? Can you explain how?
Student: Sir, you are working on the Premise of Duality. You argue there is Life and then there is Death, a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, Science can’t even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life, just the absence of it. Now tell me, Professor, do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?
Professor: If you are referring to the Natural Evolutionary Process, yes of course, I do.
Student: Have you ever observed Evolution with your own eyes, sir?
(The professor shook his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument was going)
Student: Since no one has ever observed the Process of Evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a Scientist but a Preacher?
(The class was in uproar)
Student: Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor’s brain?
(The class broke out into laughter)
Student: Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor’s brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? .. No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established Rules of Empirical, Stable and Demonstrable Protocol, Science says that you have no brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures?
(The room was silent. The Professor stared at the student, his face unfathomable)
Professor: I guess you’ll have to take them on Faith, son.
Student: That is it, sir.. exactly! The link between man and God is Faith. That is all that keeps things alive and moving!
----------------------------------------------------
That student was Albert Einstein.
Brilliant.
Beautifully done.
----------------------------------------------------
wow, this was really albert einstein? had no idea he if believed in anything at all. when stories become about real people don't they hit so much harder?
Jan 25th
87,384 notes
French word for handsome
Don’t fall into her unbreakable hold, you’ll never get out. She’ll tie you down with her lassoed lies about how you’re the one and how you’re different. Her lips will intoxicate you with their unbearable liquor, consisting of lust and trickery. You’ll awaken to the sound of your heart breaking as she leaves without a word. Because to her, you’re just a game. Level one - complete. Boss? Conquered...
Jan 23rd
Jan 23rd
45,483 notes
1 tag
Jan 23rd
WatchWatch
danikamcclure: happinessdestroysyou: OH MY GOD. For the love of god, watch this now.
Jan 22nd
336,247 notes
Jan 22nd
4 notes
Jan 17th
416 notes
Jan 17th
2,104 notes
Jan 17th
11,064 notes
Jan 12th
40,512 notes
Jan 12th
6,897 notes
Jan 12th
144 notes
reblog if you want your followers to ask you...
Jan 12th
298,476 notes
I found a dead cat on the side of the road, so I...
danikamcclure: gpoy
Jan 12th
70 notes
Jan 7th
3,005 notes
Jan 4th
69 notes
The awkward moment when you're staring at someone...
ayyemarielle:
Jan 4th
63,733 notes
Guys from other schools.
Guys from my school. I HATE HOW TRUE THIS IS!
Jan 4th
35,016 notes
FOR NARNIA!!!!!
Jan 3rd
4 notes
Jan 3rd
6 notes
Jan 3rd
20,892 notes